EduShyster has discovered a brilliant program for highly effective teachers who don’t plan to hang around for very long. Read it and get a good laugh, as you always do when you read EduShyster.
Here is the sales pitch:
Do you dream of CRUSHING the achievement gap but aren’t sure that a 14 hour work day is right for you? Are you MAD passionate about training the next generation of test takers but worry that you lack the hand gestures to keep a large class of minority students on task? Reader: I’ve got excellent news. Thanks to our excellent and innovative friends atMATCH Education you can test drive your dream with absolutely no obligation to buy.
Diane Ravitch's blog 
When I watched the video the first time, all I could think of was Seaworld and the show with the trainers: whistles, clicks, hand gestures, etc. They follow the Lemov book, Teach like a Robot as their bible. It is kind of embarrassing.
Watch the video..tell me you want that for your kids….I keep thinking of what the Orca whale did to the trainer…he thought he was playing, maybe? Eventually, the kids will revolt.
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One day we will progress beyond hand gestures and be able to control the students with simple electric shocks.
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While restrained in their chairs, wearing biometric bracelets and staring at devices….
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…please, don’t give ’em anymore “great” ideas.
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Don’t forget tracking devices too so Gates can keep track of how long kids waste time in the bathrooms or hallways.
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Pretty soon you will only need one teacher for each subject per grade level. You video tape your test prep dogma and send it to Smartboards throughout the building. You pay guards ten dollars an hour to make sure the kids stay in their seats and then travel quietly at the bell to proceed to the next video taped programming session.
Gates would be so proud of my idea on how to cut overheard. The only thing cheaper is the Milken (convicted felon who can’t pass a fingerprint check to be in a school) cyber charters.
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Being of a suspicious mind, when White Boards were installed all over DPS in Denver, I had the dark thought that maybe, just maybe the “worth” of these high priced, cumbersome items (besides the millions made by the corporation that sold these white “elephants’ to the district, probably with a nice kick back to someone in the plush offices of the Ad. building) was with these cyber teachers, all you would need is the guard and “Wa La” great savings galore! After all, if you can’t figure out the game, with ALL the new “advances” netting corporations windfalls, destroying teachers that get paid for their years of dedication by some 5-weeker, TFA; well, the bottom line IS all about greed and money! How many times do we have to see these Gatian glories that help him and his billionaire buddies laugh in their yachts about the gullible public??
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Don’t laugh, it’s probably coming to a RR in your kid’s school!
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I’m not always willing to represent myself as God with all the answers. Furthermore, I’m not willing to see the role of my students strictly as recipients of my incredible wisdom, or the concept that they have nothing to offer, or that my lesson will be ruined if I let them contribute, or guide it somewhere unexpected. I’m further unwilling to preclude the possibility that I can make their teenage interruptions somehow be part of my class. It’s kind of sad to think that my agenda would be so cut and dry that I couldn’t allow what kids bring to be part of it–more likely than not the very best part.
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You sound suspiciously humane to me.
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Thanks. I take that as a great compliment!
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Agree! I believe the Lemov techniques are all about control when one isn’t confident in their teaching abilities and their ability to develop relationships with the kids.
They mask their fear and uncertainty with control and they equate this with good teaching. It is sad if this is the training they think prepares them for teaching.
However, now that I think about it they are not teaching. It is test
prep, kill and drill…..boring.
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Very eloquently put. Thanks.
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Sounds suspiciously like independent and critical thinking is beginning to run amok in your classroom and infecting all the students you teach. This is NOT how it’s done in the nineteenth, er, twenty first century. Shows you aren’t in control. I am afraid you are going to have to retake SLANT 101 and Advanced LEMOV if you want to become the $ucce$$ful teacher we know you want to be.
Trust me, it’s for our, er, your own good. [Not you, Bill, I’m talkin’ to Arthur…]
🙂
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You could be back up for Edushyster is she ever gets sick or needs a vacation.
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Linda: I am sincerely humbled by your kind words, but I am afraid that when when it comes to Edushyster, right after she was made they broke the mold. And most mysteriously, the same happened with Jersey Jazzman.
🙂
The most unsettling thing to the charterites/privatizers is the existence of people who think for themselves and act on [not ‘put on an act about’] deeply ethical and moral principles. We’ve also got Ms. Katie O and the Klonsky bros and the numbers trio of Bruce Baker and GF Brandenburg and Gary Rubinstein, and then there’s Anthony Cody and JV Heilig and kafkateach and ElementaryRat and, well, I had better stop because I am sure to leave a whole lot of fine folks out and then I would feel the embarrassment that the rainbow coalition of edubullies doesn’t seem capable of feeling.
Want to know the difference between the abovementioned and the charterites/privatizers? How about a trip aboard the Rocketship to profitability, leaving the mundane world of poorly compensated hard work in education behind? Just click on http://www.mercurynews.com/peninsula/ci_22493868/rocketship-education-founder-john-danner-leaves-charter-school [courtesy of ElementaryRat]
And notice how the exemplar education reformer herself, Michelle Rhee, never heeds the saying “better to keep your mouth closed and be thought a fool then to open it and remove all doubt.” Do YOU have doubts about her godlike ability to fit more than one foot in her mouth at a time? *And they say miracles no longer happen.* Click on this and read the comments: http://www.nytimes.com/2013/02/03/magazine/michelle-rhee-gets-an-education.html?comments&_r=2&
And I would be remiss if I did not end with: props to you, Linda. Keep on keepin’ on.
🙂
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While I watched this TRULY informative video, I hoped it, too was part of the joke! To see a corporate type who looked disconcertingly like the GOP, VP, the harsh reality of what kool-aid they were packaging! Interesting scenario to destroy education in the US…1. Turn the public against the teachers as being; lazy, stupid, and of course, incompetent. 2. Institute “new” methods to teach the basics; long history here of
purposeful failures such as: sight reading=killed off a whole generation of readers in the 50’s, new math=same stupidity, same result of math mindless kids, on and on. 3. When these intentional, dumb down, but forced upon teacher curriculum result in plummeting world wide
ratings…blame the teachers who didn’t want to do what they KNEW would produce failure! 4. Trash public education by following steps 1-4 and last but not least, give the shipwreck over to clowns like these corporate lackeys to do the final coup de tat to
anything resembling excellence in education! The fringe Bennie is TFA guinea pigs that are cheaper to pay than Sears sock sellers!! Questions???
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I am not a strict constructivist teacher; there is a time and a place for teacher-directed learning. And I understand this was only part of the time spent in class for these teachers. I will assume that there is time at these schools for discovery learning (mostly because it would be heart-breaking to think of a school without it).
But holy cow, that was still some of the most narcissistic, self-directed, egocentric classroom behavior on the part of a teacher I have ever seen. Hand signals? You mean an entirely new language, created solely by an authority figure, to exact compliance with minimal effort on their part?
No suburban school would accept this. This is a school for “those people’s” children.
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Or animals in a zoo or sea critters in an aquarium. Through the hoop…clap, clap, clap..here is your minnow. Clap, clap, clap. P A T H E T I C !
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Way to go, Linda! “Discovery” is a great adjunct to teaching strategies, but I feel is all too often imposed upon all subjects that in order to adhere, teachers must turn into mental pretzels to have students “Discover” phonics, history (if its even on the curriculum), etc. WHY is education so darn scared of not accepting every flim flam
“progressive” idea or theory? More lab rat studies, please! Case in point: Open concept! Now everyone slams such idiocy that a farmer could have predicted the results…he worked 24/7 in an “open concept” laboratory, the place was a cacophony of noise! Poor guy couldn’t measure out his hay with all that commotion. Fast forward to ’72 when this great idea swept the country! My school was adding an addition to the elementary school. ALL the teachers, except moi, were hurraying this progressive concept and literally fighting to have their room part of the addition. I, a newly minted OSU teacher, had the audacity to asked “WHY??” I got horrifying stares, questions if I was really with it, and sales pitches of: carpeted floors, acoustical ceiling tiles and fire drill quick ability to instruct 100 kids at one time! I, crusader for sanity, said I could pass on the carpet, tiles and three ring circus atmosphere! Guess who got nailed in the OC? Yep, and by Christmas time the teacher fights were then over who got to return to a room, door and a teachable environment! Kind of a parable for our times…
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Mary,
Will they EVER listen to the teachers? If not, we are doomed. The kids are doomed. Our society is screwed.
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Succinctly put, prescient as to where this will all end! The demise of not only education in America, but as Jefferson said, we can’t have a democracy without an educated public, and he was not referring to test takers! Sobering when you consider the ulterior motives of such paragons of intellectual excellence as
the leadership of Texas’s GOP put in their education plank in ’12, the elimination of critical thinking in public schools, then claimed, when it was discovered and the consequential shock was expressed, that it was just a glitch in editing…gotta have some LOW critical thinkers to buy that laughable line!
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I loved the woman in the first video. When you see someone multitask so well, that they can teach school and simultaneously auction off a tractor, that is truly something to behold.
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TC,
That was funny. You made me laugh for the first time toady and for that, I thank you.
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I’ll second that vote! God knows its hard to find anything but gallows humor in this sea of stupidity disguised as a corporate money making remedy to public system staffed by under paid, trashed teachers! Thanks for the laugh…I needed that!
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Edushyster-absolutely awesome. Goldstein’s spin on charter turnover is laughable. I’m sure many people enter Match wanting to teach, but once they’ve taught there for a year they say “No way will I teach in another charter school.” It’s funny, I’ve never heard the reformers talk about the need to reduce charter turnover. Why? It helps the school make more money. No raises to worry about. No pensions or 401k. No, No, just a ton of money going to the CEO who is the only lifer. Yes. Lifer teachers are what is wrong with public schools. But, lifer CEOs are great for charters and schools!!!HA
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The reason facts never enter the mind rotting propaganda is that it would sully the hype that is pumped out daily about the joyful, teachers who strangely flee charter chains and TFA’ers who likewise sprint away from educational euphoria as soon as their contract expires, leaving the superintendents joyful too, as they can count the money they’ll save with the next TFA guinea pig to replace the “I”s wise” pseudo teacher who will gladly return to working at what they were doing prior to this “job”…would be interesting to know the stats about those former careers were, now wouldn’t it?
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The video is so sad. I can envision these kids in a workplace in 15 years being treated the same way.
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Thank you for shopping at Walmart. Paper or plastic? Would you like fries with that? Please visit again. All you need is memorization and regurgitation.
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Oh one more thing. If the economy begins to heat-up, go back and reveal the turnover again. They won’t be able to keep teachers in the buildings. They’ll be dragging in anybody off the street to teach. Or, they’ll hook the kids up to virtual schools.
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*If* the economy ever heats up again – “If” being the operative word. In my more conspiracy-minded moments, I’m pretty convinced that TPTB won’t make that mistake again. You certainly wouldn’t want an informed, comfortable middle class who might actually have the knowledge and the time to oppose the New World Order, would you?
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Well I suppose TPTB would like the economy to “heat up” in the same way it did under Clinton and Bush– with unsustainable asset bubbles. They can cash in and cash out when it crashes.
But they do like a scared and compliant labor pool.
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Didn’t like the ” ……large class of minority students on task part”
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The kids have to be interested too, right? There is a limit to how much kids can be “forced” to learn. Many of those kids may not have the ability to understand advanced math or Latin, literature, etc. I think that the underlining assumption about all people having equal ability to learn and master things is false. The reformers are wrong for assuming that all kids will score the same given the same teaching. This is patently false and defies human logic. Yes, there is something called inherent intelligence. You either have it or you don’t. It has a lot to do with who you parents are and whether they are high I.Q., as well. A genius father doesn’t always equal a genius son, but high intellectual ability runs in families. Look at Aldous Huxley’s family, etc. High I.Q. children have a curiosity about the world and want to know things. We all admit that athletic ability is to a large part inherited. Why do we think that the ability to learn is all “nuture” and no “nature.” Of course there are some intelligent people in all samples, they will never get the majority of kids to score like kids in the suburbs, with parents who are doctors, lawyers, scientists, etc. Never… So in many ways this reform movement is coming from the Left, with the denial of human nature, etc. I can’t win the 100 meter dash no matter how much I practice. It would be cruel to compare me to a sample of Jamaicans and insist that I run as fast as they can. This whole thing is cruel.
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Read this..catch the last few lines…
“Choice is not a problem. Quality is not a problem. Parents in this district don’t have complaints about our teachers. City planning says these new charters are a bad idea.”
Brooke Parker answers the door of her rented Greenpoint townhouse in her sweatpants, two days after Christmas. Her kindergartner is racing around with a playdate. Parker has lived in the neighborhood for 20 years and has two daughters and a stepdaughter. She used to work in film; her husband, Erik Parker, is a well-regarded contemporary artist. She is funny, profane, intimidatingly well informed, and talks almost nonstop for more than an hour. The co-founder and representative of Williamsburg and Greenpoint Parents: Our Public Schools (WAGPOPS), the parent group spearheading the opposition to Success Academy and Citizens of the World in District 14, she has a bracing message for outsiders like Grannis and Moskowitz coming into the neighborhood: “What the fuck? Who the hell are you? How do you get to decide we need a new school?”
http://www.villagevoice.com/2013-01-30/news/Eva-Moskowitz-Bloomberg-Charter-Schools/
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At a Superbowl Party ….
Mom: “Yes so that’s the problem with his schedule this year.”…..
Me: “Oh us too! …and how about the testing?”
Mom: “huh”
Me: “well you know …this year our kids our being asked to take more tests”
Mom: “Oh , really? Didn’t know that… now about the math class schedule I was telling you about…..
After asking others, no one, not one knew the extra teach to test time that is taking up time in school.
Some parents have no idea what is going on!!!!!!
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I initially thought that “MatchEducation” was a joke but incredibly, it’s real.
Also, I watched the Lemov video with the sound off. The students looked like they were being held hostage by a teacher who had lost it. It would be funny if it weren’t so sad.
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That was my initial reaction. I thought this had to be satire done by some anti charter group– the obstacle course, the video, the help wanted ad.–and I was thinking “they were a little too over the top to be believable!”.
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Whoa, Jack! You are behind the times. You do know that they have found that an IQ score can be changed significantly. A lot depends on the environment and the opportunities provided. What does it mean that athletic ability is inherited? Real athletes spend an inordinate amount of time perfecting their performance as does anyone who aspires to excellence in an endeavor. Maybe I arrived a bit more coordinated than you, but you will outperform me easily if you put the time in. My “natural talent” will only carry me so far. Having been raised in the suburbs, I can tell you that community expectations and the opportunities available had a lot more to do with success than innate intelligence. I am not strictly a nurture over nature advocate; we do have different interests, talents, and abilities, but I also am not about to start deciding what most children can learn by their IQ scores.
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Fake teachers and now fake grad schools of Ed. WT? What’s next? I dread the responses.
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Ever notice how these “solutions” are never questioned and connecting the dots, show the perpetual demise of public education, teachers, unions and students’ abilities? Don’t need Sherlock to see the purpose behind the insanity!
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Interesting shirt that a young girl had on near the end of the video. It said There Are No Shortcuts on the back of the shirt.
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From Forbes.com, Mr. Charles Sposato, the head of Match Education:
“Mr. Sposato, age 57, was elected Chairman of the Board of the Company in August 2000. Mr. Sposato is a past recipient of recognition of the Who’s Who in Executives & Business. He has served as president of the Cecil County Home Builders Association and as director of the Home Builders Association of Maryland. Mr. Sposato served on the Board of Union Hospital of Cecil County Health Systems, Inc., is past-chairman of Cecil County Health Ventures, Inc. and is a past member of the Union Hospital Finance Committee. He has served on the Governmental Affairs Council of the Maryland Bankers Association. Mr. Sposato previously served on the Maryland Bankers Political Action Committee and on the board of Directors of Community Bankers Securities. He is a former Director of Northern Chesapeake Hospice Foundation and Trustee of Mount Aviat Academy. Mr. Sposato is a member of the Knights of Columbus. Mr. Sposato is on the Board of Directors for Maryland Title Center, LLC. Mr. Sposato has also attended the Maryland Bankers School. He is Mr. Saunders’s uncle. His participation in our local community for 35 years brings knowledge of the local economy and business opportunities for the Bank. Effective July 12, 2011, Charles Sposato resigned from the Board of Directors and as Chairman of the Registrant’s wholly-owned subsidiary, Cecil Bank. Mr. Sposato continues to serve as a Director and Chairman of the Board of the Registrant.”
I don’t see any experience in education however. No teaching. No education degrees.
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AND you never will with the wolves of public education and teachers! They’re CORPORATIST S and that’s ALL they’re about: corporate control and greed!
In Denver, we’ve had two superintendents whose educational background wouldn’t qualify them to be a para in a classroom…but they darn sure did institute a BUSINESS PLAN, that has predictably brought destruction, EEOC laws suites for age/race and consequent retaliation by the 100’s, and financial devastation to boot! So much for the “BUSINESS PLAN!” Sometimes we are snookered by these pseudo public spirited
billionaires/presidents, etc. because we can’t conceive of such money mad agendas cloaked in such saccharin veneers. But examine all the “solutions” these wolves posit:
NCL, RTT. mind numbing observations that would drive any CEO to a padded room, Michelle Rhee’s solution of inquisitional destruction of teachers, which she shows the most enjoyment in performing. Now she’s hooked up with Jeb Bush, the brother of “W” who first perpetrated the whole charade on the public! How many examples of these
purposeful, destructive plans do we have to suffer under until the light turns on and we see the corporate enemy these supposed do gooders try are!
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OK, so the grad school of Education is incorporated and you can get a Master’s in Effective Teaching. From their website: Unlike traditional Master’s Degree programs—where degrees are conferred primarily for completing readings, written assignments, and student teaching —degree recipients from SGSE must also demonstrate that they are effective full-time teachers who are capable of driving student achievement.
http://matcheducation.org/mtrr
I don’t what is more comical: EduShyster’s column or this website.
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How true, but what isn’t funny is how the corporate elite will sell this farce to schools and the public! Teaching has been reduced to something that can become a career faster than a plumber at tech school!
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And that is what is truly sad.
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Totally disgusting video. None mentioned Pavlov’s slobberng dog or Skinner’s rat lab. Robots for the future!
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Exactly! A fellow teacher friend of mine put it this way, “We’re not educating students, we educating ditch diggers!”
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Some research states there is no transfer with this type of behavioral “training”, but the new “experts” are only interested in short term test results. According to research, I have read, this type of training carried to an extreme rate can actually bypass the brain. One must queston if it is legal or moral to use conditioning on human subjects without their knowledge of the method or their consent. This is especially true of children. I suggest reading B. F. Skinner’s books for more information.
Reed Martin, wrote “Legal Challenges to Behavior Modification”: “Trends in Schools, Corrections and Mental Health” in 1975, ISBN 0-87822-158-1, Research Press, 2612 North Mattis Avenue, Champaign, IL 61860. I believe he still has a web on line. His old book may be found on line, or it was in the past if any are interested. I found it to be most informative when I read it years ago.
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