I just learned from a reader about a new group in Pittsburgh to stop bullying.
It reminded me to share with you my thoughts about a current movie called “Bully.”
I saw it on a cable station as an “on demand” movie. A friend urged me to see it. He was right. It is gripping and heart-breaking.
It tells the story of several children who were bullied, taunted, teased, ridiculed on a daily basis by other students. Some were beaten up and attacked on the school bus. Some committed suicide. Some projected weakness because they “looked different” or were vulnerable in some way. Some were gay. Their parents couldn’t understand why their child had become an outcast, a target for meanness. Their teachers and principals tried but didn’t do nearly enough to protect them. Ultimately, we need not only to protect these children but to have a cultural sea change that makes bullying unacceptable.
Every community should have parent/teacher/community groups to take a stand and defend the right of children to live in peace and to be accepted by their peers and their community.
The reader posted this comment:
“We are starting a parent, teacher organization to prevent bullying of all types ( principal on teacher, student on teacher, parent on teacher teacher/principal on parent and kids. We want to take a community based public health approach to school based violence in Pittsburgh Public Schools. If people are interested in joining they can contact us at parentsagainstbullyinginpgh@gmail.com”
Diane Ravitch's blog 
The movie was riveting. I’m not sure if it’s still there, but the movie-makers had a whole website with a PDF kit or people who work with children.
http://www.thebullyproject.com
Wow, that was weird. I clicked on the bully project link and a pop up demands my birth date saying “we’re watching out for you”. There was no X on the pop up if one did not want to divulge their birth date. I got a Big Brotherish feeling.
As far as bullying goes, one has to look at society in general because our children reflect the adults and culture around them.
They have violent video games now that were not there in my generation.
They have TV shows like “Survivor” where people conspire to throw off the targeted ones. And so-called reality shows abound.
I think these all feed into the bullying mentality. Pick on those that are different or weaker. Keep at it until they disappear–either through suicide or crushing their soul until their light goes out.
“There was no X on the pop up if one did not want to divulge their birth date. I got a Big Brotherish feeling.”
No, just plain ol bullying! Do it my way or you don’t get to play!
This is such an important topic. Perhaps those schools that put noncompliant students in white shirts as a way of publicly shaming them should think about their actions in the context of bullying.
My child’s school has an anti-bullying policy in which it was decided that gossip and rumors were a form of bullying. So the administration took it on themselves to track down and squash every rumor. You can imagine the spectacle and fiasco this became. One student decided to harrass my daughter by going to the principal and “reporting” (read making-up) a nasty rumor. This resulted in she and her boyfriend being dragged into the office and accused and grilled without me present. It was horrible. All in the name of stopping bullying.
I regret to admit that I do not believe that we know how to create programs that would stop bullying that can be applied successfully on any sort of scale. Zero-tolerance policies tend to sweep in a lot of innocent children such as those who merely witness a bullying incident without “intevening” – at age eleven! It would be a lovely world without bullying but I for one think that it is not within the human condition to eliminate it entirely and that all such programs will tend toward punishment-based strategies that will do great harm while fail to help most victums.
Yes, it is a key topic and I was thinking yesterday that I did not understand the dynamics fully enough while reading about Special Master Adamowski in CT (which I will reference below in a recent Jonathan Pelto blog). What does one do when the “man in charge” is a bully? It seems like parentsagainstbullyinginpgh may have some insights. Thank you for telling us about them, and I will be contacting them.
http://jonathanpelto.com/2013/07/19/special-master-steven-adamowski-helping-to-ensure-malloys-defeat/.
I have a few experiences working for bullies in my district. Bullying exists from the top, superintendent, to the principals and so called coaches that are hired to support teachers (lol). I retired after 33 years as I was tired of the bull$&@?. It became increasingly apparent to me that my district wanted robots that could follow rules and directives and not creative educators. Don’t miss teaching in that environment but miss the kids!
Yes, you are so right! How can we be examples for our students when we, as adults are bullied by our supervisors.I’ve had my supervisor come to my class and bully me in front of my students. This culture of harassment and bullying is pervasive in our district. For the students, it’s a real problem that we, as adults, have to step in and stop or arrange that it be stopped.
I’m VERY lucky I don’t live in a district like this but every new teacher we get from another district has horror stories to tell about being bullied every day (though I have a feeling my district is bound to get a bit more like this, soon). But lately (ok the past few years) I have felt bullied every where I go about my profession. Teacher bashing has become a nationwide sport. We are the new scapegoat. I know it’s all the spin being put out for a much larger agenda but when I have to defend my career choice at every picnic I go to with the larger public…it gets demoralizing. I find I have started to turn down larger events where people know I’m a teacher (church picnics, even). I was bullied as a kid…but nothing like I am now but people I barely know!
Right now the whole public education system is built around bullying. From the feds to the state departments of education to the district administration to the building administratin to the teachers and down onto the students the very real existential threats are there on a daily basis. Is it no wonder that the students feed off that bullying, some to do the bullying themselves? When fear is a dominating factor in the day to day operations of an organization that organization will never be humane.
Duane, if I lived anywhere remotely close to you I would try to bully you into going to go have a drink with me so we could discuss/commiserate about this topic further. You are right on and have put to words so clearly what the stark and profound truth is in describing the unfortunate daily reality of what has become education. Why would anyone think that a high anxiety, blood pressure rising, intimidating/fear provoking, destructive interpersonal interactions or environment would be positively productive in the least to assist with anyone reaching goals and producing a quality outcome? The pressure is a constant force with a tiered effect coming from the top down. Higher-ups, Admin., teachers, students. Then the abuse can work its way back up the ladder. Throw an angry parent in the mix and things can really escalate. This is more than sticks and stones. Where is the human element? There is an abuse cycle that exists (that was maybe unintentionally created by mandates set forth but that nonetheless over time have now created this charged and intense chaos)that needs to be broken. The competition, the quest for perfection, the demands and pressure of racing to the top, being responsible and accountable for everything (and the conflict involved that exists when what you are being asked to do does not jive with your philosophy of ed. or what you believe to be the best developmentally appropriate practice for the kids you work with… and instead of a positive influence to improve or inspire it is too often the approach of dictated direction, documentation, or break you down and you’re on your own to build yourself back up… It is a fire being fueled everyday and our tops are getting ready to blow off. I know that I am not the only steamed up little teapot out there. There is something very wrong with the entire system that needs fixing. What happens and what many experience is not happy or healthy (children and adults alike) This topic is real and needs attention. I am glad this post was dedicated to it. How can anyone learn anything or teach to their fullest potential if they are scared and never feel secure? It should not take a new curriculum or assessment tool to tell us that there is failure. It should be rather elementary. We can’t excel with Bloom’s Taxonomy until our Maslow’s Needs are sufficiently met. And,in Ruby Payne’s A Framework Framework For Understanding Poverty, the little girl would not do her best work for her teacher until she trusted that teacher. There is a valuable and critical lesson to be learned from that…
I was bullied by a principal once in the main lobby in front of other teachers, parents, and students . My blood pressure rose so much I thought I could possibly jump her but that’s not my style. I went back to my classroom, counted to 100, and went back to the principal and in no uncertain term told her that she could not speak to me that way, it was disrespectful and inappropriate, and if it ever happened again I would report her to her immediate supervisors. Not that they would do anything because they support bullying BUT she never bothered me again!
You can stop or curtail bullying in the schools, but what about the neighborhoods? I taught in a high school where gangs were slowly trying to take control. The students would intimidate other students and teachers with looks and sneers. Students who were bullied were warned to comply or get it in the neighborhood. Nobody talked aout of fear. This warning came in the way of a look. When confronted by authority, they denied it. You coundn’t prove a thing. How do you stop bullying when the whole neighborhood is controlled by a number of gangs?
Don’t forget teacher on teacher bullying. How does this occur? The bully reacher must have his way. The bully teacher ruins every committee meeting by twistng every objectivecto his agenda. The bully teacher is a mole for the principal. The bully teacher intimidates anyone who doesn’t worship his ideas. The bully teacher doesn’t like to share or collaborate. The bully teacher announces that when merit pay kicks in, he will close his door and make sure he does whatever it takes to get his scores to the top, even if he uses totaliarian tactics with his students, belittling them and wearing them down to submission. Yet he is the Golden Boy darling of the administration because he browbeats the good scores out of his students. Yeh this is a good reason to retire.
Don’t forget the snide comments at meetings, the cluster of teachers who eat lunch together in a classroom and bash anyone they don’t like, or those who deliberately exclude others from after hours social events. Sometimes I feel like I’m either back in high school or a cast member in “Mean Girls”.
May be a result of our foreign policy.
Despite notions to the contrary, children are always learning,
the question is, what are they learning?
STOP the BULLYING from the NSA, CIA, FBI, TSA, and the IRA. Now these are bullies to the MAX…include Obama in this gang of bullies who pontificate.
It’s ironic that bullying awareness is rising just as teachers and to some degree administrators are being subjected to unprecedented levels of bullying by the wealthy and their puppet politicians.
Educators are being told they have to do things the bullies way even though the bullies don’t know what they are doing, and are forced to give up their lunch to the bully (and often their retirement or even jobs).
Alicort, thank you for initiating this strand on bullying coming from the top. I have been bullied the moment I was hired. The last incident involved a peer/school site union rep bad-mouthing several teachers, including me. And get this…the principal sat right there. The same union rep publicly embarrassed me at a staff meeting. Again, the principal was at earshot. I really hate where I work and the district. I cannot imagine returning for another year. The thought literally makes me sick to my stomach. If that was too much information, sorry.
There is a a push towards conformity; I always called myself fiercely independent and it would get me in trouble (I had a few principals who understood otherwise I would not have lasted in the job). There is also a “code” of blue that is one should be silent. This is just as strong as we know of in the police departments and it is in schools; be loyal and “don’t rat”….. etc. It can be very isolating when you feel you are the only one who is confronting abuses of power. Look into the “games people play” and the one called “let’s you and him fight”. It is a natural occurring thing everywhere. You don’t want to get into the arena as the one who is always victimized; nor the one who has to stand up to the bullies alone etc. There are many individuals who will say “I’m Switzerland (neutral”) after they have egged you on to confront the authority (if you are a teacher in a school for example). There are other people who just say “a pox on both your houses:” and they feel they can be above it. These are social phenomena; when it comes to students we used to have one called “ego contagion” where the leader transfers things onto other people to act them out.
No problem. wish I had the support of this blog when I was dealing with it! I be,eve bullying is a problem at many different levels. Have you ever seen the show Nig Brothers? Take a look. It models some of the worst behavior I have ever seen by pretty, apparently cool young adults.
“Bully” is such a phenomenal film that I think every person should see regardless of whether they’re a teacher/student/parent/etc. The film speaks an honest truth about the true life of victims of bullies and the devastating effects of it.
-Kaitlyn
Do we include bullying from Arne, from the states, from Gates and company, from Pearson, etc., telling us what we have to do if we don’t want to lose our funding, our teachers, etc.? Education right now is all about bullying, threats, more threats, and fear, from top to bottom.
Funny, we (teachers) are to be the models and teachers of non bulling. Yet we are receiving bullying behaviors from students, administrators, parents, etc. This kind of behavior must stop!
absolutely; you are correct
When my nieces were going to school I would say “if anyone wants to punish you say I need to check with my mom first.”
Today I feel I need to prepare the high school neice in Albany; the teacher or principal might beat up on you because they are afraid of losing a job. The state department of education is beating up on the principals and schools so we need to watch and see what happens and tell me what you observe at school. This neice i Albany is leaving a parochial school environment to go to the regular public high school and I know she will be “different” there and will need to adjust to curriculum, tests, etc…. etc.
I wanted to give her a “handbook” if anyone has any suggestions…. i think she will do ok with the “playground bullies” and the “drug store cowboys”. When I was younger the principal would just say “deal with it; you will get a lot worse than that in your life” but we need to help them build resilience (it can be learned)
If you have any summer reading time left, google Seymour Sarason; he wrote on the schools and the culture of change and I think he would understand everything we are saying about ed reform.
Seymour Bernard Sarason (January 12, 1919, Brownsville, Brooklyn, New York – January 28, 2010, New Haven, Connecticut)[1] was Professor of Psychology Emeritus at Yale University, where he taught from 1945 to 1989. He is the author of over forty books and is considered to be one of the most significant researchers in education and educational psychology in the United States. The primary focus of his work was on education reform in the United States. In the 1950s he and George Mandler initiated the research on test anxiety.He founded the Yale Psycho-Educational Clinic in 1961 and was one of the principal leaders in the community psychology movement. He is the brother of psychologist Irwin Sarason.