As you may know, I was born and raised in Houston, Texas.
I am third of eight children.
My parents were both Jewish, as am I.
Yet every year we celebrated Christmas.
Is this puzzling? It wasn’t at all puzzling to me and my siblings.
Every Christmas, the family bought a Christmas tree, and we all joined in decorating it with lights, ornaments, and tinsel.
Every Christmas morning, we woke up like a noisy tribe about five a.m. and rushed to discover that we all had presents under the tree.
Why did our Jewish family celebrate Christmas?
To begin with, my parents had been born into observant Jewish families. My father was born in Savannah, Georgia, where he was the youngest of nine children and the only boy. He was spoiled rotten, left high school without graduating, and tried (but failed) to make it in vaudeville as a hoofer and comedian. My mother was born in Bessarabia and came to America at the end of World War 1 as a nine-year-old girl with her mother and little sister. They traveled on a ship (the “Savoie”) loaded with returning American soldiers, then made their way to Houston to meet my grandfather, who was a tailor and had come to America before the war broke out.
What my parents wanted most was to be seen as “real Americans.” My mother was especially zealous about wanting to speak perfect English (she arrived speaking only Yiddish). She was very proud that she earned a high school diploma from the Houston public schools. In her eyes, real Americans celebrated Christmas. So, of course, we had a tree, and we believed that Santa Claus brought the presents. There was no religious content to our tree and our gifting.
We went to public school, where we learned all the Christmas songs. We went to assemblies and sang “Silent Night,” “Joy to the World,” “O Little Town of Bethlehem,” and all the other traditional songs. I knew I was Jewish, and I usually hummed certain words instead of saying them, but nonetheless I loved the songs and I love them still. I was never offended by singing Christmas songs at public school. It was what we did.
Of course, my siblings and I went to Sunday School at the synagogue, and my brothers were bar mitzvah. I was “confirmed,” which was a ceremony that occurred at the end of tenth grade, when we read from the prayer book as a group.
I should add that we started every day in public school with a short reading from the Bible, over the loudspeaker, followed by a prayer and the recitation of the Pledge of Allegiance.
I was okay with the Bible reading, the prayers, the Christmas songs. I was also okay with our family putting up a Christmas tree while belonging to a synagogue and practicing our Jewish rituals and holy days.
I committed one major faux pas as a result of my upbringing in two religious traditions. On one occasion, when I was about 12, the rabbi at my reform temple invited me to join him on the altar and say a prayer. I said “The Lord’s Prayer,” the one that begins, “Our father, who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name” prayer, and there was some awkwardness afterwards. I had no idea that I was saying a Christian prayer, drawn from the Gospel of Matthew, in the synagogue! I had heard it hundreds of times in school. I think I was forgiven my error. After that, the rabbi was careful to propose a specific prayer from the prayer book for children who were invited to speak from the altar.
Many things have changed, and I understand that. But when I go with my partner to midnight Mass on Christmas Eve at the Oratory of St. Boniface in Brooklyn, I am glad I know the words to the songs. I learned them in public school in Houston. I look around and am not surprised to see a fairly large number of other Jews from the neighborhood, also joining in singing the songs with the choir. It is Christmas. It is a time to celebrate peace and joy and goodwill towards all. We can all share those hopes.

I love this story! Please, Diane, someday write your memoirs.
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Merry Christmas to you and your family!
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I am Jewish, was confirmed in a Reform temple and my family also celebrated Christmas each year, in a non-religious way, with a tree and Santa bringing gifts.
In fact, ever since my early childhood, Christmas has been my favorite holiday. The songs have always seemed to magically captivate my heart. From “Up on the House Top” to the Hallelujah chorus in Handel’s “Messiah,” religious and not, Christmas music is so incredibly touching. I am also enamored by the lights. I think that anyone who is open to loving and giving can enjoy the spirit of this wonderful holiday.
A very Merry Christmas to you and yours!
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I was brought up in a mixed household, father Jewish, mother Christian, in a Jewish neighborhood in Brooklyn (Flatbush and Church ). We were one of two mixed families in the apartment complex (about 200 families) and the only Protestant family in the school (PS 249). Although we were the only ones on our “side” of the building with a tree, our Jewish neighbors enjoyed coming to our house and celebrating with us. After all, I accompanied their children to participate in the Jewish holidays (Purim was my favorite).
Christmas has become very secularized. It’s about spending money, not so much about religion, at least in the malls. I spent all day yesterday preparing stockings for my adult children and my grand kids. My husband wrapped the other gifts. We did it to demonstrate our love and to keep traditions alive. I also did it to emulate my love for the Christian ideals, and their gift to me was their attendance at the lovely Christmas Eve service at my church.
Although I love buying them presents, for me, the best gifts are free – sharing time and being a family.
So Merry Christmas to my fellow bloggers, whether you celebrate or not. Merry Christmas to Diane. And Merry Christmas to those we battle (May they find enlightenment).
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This is fascinating. I’m Jewish and grew up in a large Orthodox community in Atlanta. Even there, a handful of families did a version of Christmas too.
A friend on Facebook posted this article yesterday from uber-conservative Dennis Prager, calling on all Jews and other non-Christians to do exactly what you’re describing here, and yet his call is wildly offensive while your story is perfectly reasonable. Why? Because *your family chose to do it for your own good reasons* instead of being called pariahs for choosing not to.
http://www.dennisprager.com/jews-wish-merry-christmas/
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I haven’t watched FoxNews et al. in decades, so I’d forgotten how, ever since the “moral majority” of the Reagan era, ultra-conservatives use hate-mongering spin couched in self-righteousness to keep their base angry, fearful and loyal. Ugh.
When I was growing up, my Jewish neighbors and friends did not have Christmas trees or celebrate Christmas the way my family did. That had been a tradition in my maternal Reform Jewish family at least as long as they’ve been in America, for three generations before me –even though my grandfather was born in England and was raised as an Orthodox Jew.
We were not so lucky when my step-father came into the picture. He was literally the Grinch who stole Christmas. He wouldn’t let us have a tree anymore and, as a 9 year old, I was devastated. My mom wouldn’t let him deny us any more of the holiday than that though, so I got creative. My mom had many Christian friends who sent us Christmas cards, so I started a tradition of hanging them up in the shape of a Christmas tree above our fireplace and gifts were placed around the hearth. Then, about 10 years later, when my older sister married a Christian and had a baby, we convinced my step-father that he should not deny Christmas to that Christian child and he let us get a small tree for her. Thank goodness for Jewish guilt! (We never told him that she wasn’t being raised to follow either religion.)
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Beautiful, Diane! Not everything needs to be politically correct! Certainly, it teaches acceptance of differences. Merry Christmas to you and yours, from one of your Christan supporters!
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Yours, Diane, is a spirit as large as Texas.
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Merry merry to all! The true spirit of the season, to love one another, is all that’s important and your mother did a good job of teaching you that as evidenced by all that you put into this blog (and life in general). Thanks for all you do and have a great winter break!
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I used to think there were such great differences between religions, until I studied Buddhism, Hinduism, Tao, Confucious in college. I was shocked to discover that we had as much in common as in differences! All religions have the saying “do unto others as you would have done unto you.” It doesn’t matter if you’re Christian or Jewish or Muslim or Buddhist–
Peace and Blessings to you and your partner, Diane.
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I tell my (primarily Mormon) students the same thing. If all religious faiths realized how much we all have in common in our beliefs, rather than focusing on the differences, the world would be a much better place. Merry Christmas today, Happy Kwanzaa tomorrow, Happy Hannukah last month, as well as Yom Kippur, Ramadan, Divali and the rest. And thank you for sharing your beautiful story, Diane! A blessed holiday to you all.
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My ex-husband is Jewish, but he never celebrated Hanukkah until I went out and got us a menorah. He didn’t even know the prayers, but he sure loved Christmas. The message of peace on Earth, goodwill to all is for everyone regardless of where you get your god. Peace to All!
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Thank you for sharing your wonderful history of Christmas. As a person who was born on Christmas day, I reflect today God’s gift of his son, His sacrific to our world, and blessings He has bestoyed upon me, many. May the light of citizenship learned in public schools shine forward in our fight in the war on public education. Peace on earth, goodwill towards men.
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Perhaps an illusion, but I feel I speak for many viewers who appreciate the spirit of giving throughout the year because:
Every day we can go online, click on dianevatitch.net and open a new present of postings and comments.
Courtesy of the generosity of the owner of this blog.
And from whence this spirit of giving when so often it is met with ungrateful sneers and smears?
“From caring comes courage.” [Lao Tzu]
Peace on earth. Good will to all.
And with a special nod to Diane for caring enough to take the lead in ensuring a “better education for all.”
😎
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This is a great story, reflecting a humanity that is so often missing in our more “liberal” or “progressive” philosophies today. The bits and scraps of your life that you have shared make me hope that you will write a memoir.
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Christians and Jews, who share a common heritage, have much to celebrate.
Happy Holidays to all of you and especially to those who serve the nation’s children.
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Merry Christmas!
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I grew up a Lutheran and my memories of Christmas had nothing to do with religion, but with the beautiful tree, the smell of pine that filled the entire house and the presents. I remember one morning waking up to a Lionel train that ran from the living room all the way down the hall and back. My father said I just kept saying “How about that?”
I converted to Judaism 20 years ago and I don’t have a tree, nor do I exchange presents. What I do like is that people are just a bit nicer, a bit merrier and whatever hope and joy the season brings seems to make folks happy. That’s good enough for me.
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Here’s a brief essay printed Sunday in Minnesota’s largest daily paper about experiences of a young Hmong-American living in a housing project. It was written by a Hmong-American, St. Paul Public Schools graduate, first generation American (immigrant), high school and college graduate.
One of the things that makes this country extraordinary, at least for some of us, is the ability of the nation to help immigrants move in one generation from not speaking English and being very low income, to speaking English and having a fine education.
YOUR holiday may be happier, richer & more meaningful if you take 2 minutes to read this extraordinary essay by Kao Kalia Yang.
http://www.startribune.com/lifestyle/236724421.html
This award-winning young woman also has written an incredible book about her experiences with her family and with the St. Paul Public Schools.
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How VERY beautiful Dr. Ravitch. Thanks immensely for sharing your story. For me it suggests the very essence of what it means to be “American”. As mentioned in another blog, for me the sharing in the traditions and yes, the belief systems of our neighbors is a vital part of education. Some years ago an occurrence happened which made me search out for “answers”, answers absolutely imperative to find peace of mind. I read in virtually all the religious and philosophical traditions. For me, the interesting things were that in all the religious traditions one finds the same basic “human”, “spiritual” quests. Education is a journey, not a destination in my view. There should be more that unites us than separates us as “human” beings. In each tradition there was found meaningful “answers” to my quest. In the Jewish tradition: Martin Buber’s “I and Thou” shaped my thinking as much as any book ever read. In the Bhagavad Gita I found the beginnings of meditation, India’s “best gift to the world”. The Koran itself it must be admitted did not do that much for me but in knowing some Muslim people and reading about Islam, there was found the same “humanity”. Rumi is one of my favorite poets and to watch the Sufis “twirl” in the manner which Rumi advocated was beautiful indeed. At one time books by C. S. Lewis filled a need. My definition of education is “expanding one’s parameters of perspective”. Beautiful people, traditions, ideas et al are found in all cultures it seems to me if we take the trouble to look for them.
Thanks again Dr. Ravitch. For me: beautiful.
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Some of the most wonderful American (non-liturgical) Christmas songs, ie. “White Christmas”, “Let it Snow”, “Rudolph the Red- Nosed Reindeer”, “The Christmas Song”,
“Holly Jolly Christmas”, “I’ll Be Home for Christmas”, “It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year”, “Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree”, “Silver Bells”, “Santa Claus is Coming to Town”, “Sleigh Ride”, etc–were written/composed by Jews. Christmas is not just a Christian holiday–it’s an American Federal holiday, with good reason. America is deeply rooted in Judao-Christian values and traditions, embedded in our founding documents, who were written by those deeply influenced by the Old Testament (Torah )and the New Testament While avoiding specific theological content, the founders sought to universalize Judao-Christian concepts. The attempts by the cultural and political Left in our public schools to completely purge religion from the public square is a violation of the Free Exercise clause of the First Amendment. The Establishment clause is equally clear–The Founders didn’t want a national or government-endorsed religion, ie. the Church of England or anything close to a theocracy. What they also didn’t want is a purge of universal religious values from the public square, nor a people unmoored from the idea of a Creator or Natural Rights.
As a Jewish American history teacher who grew up in a home with a strong Jewish religious and cultural identity, may I wish to all of you who both celebrate the holiday and to those, like Diane, who appreciate what the holiday symbolizes to our society, a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.
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Dear Ms. Ravitch,
Thank you for sharing these memories. I thoroughly enjoyed reading about your rich experiences and remembering my own.
Wishing you the very best in the new year.
Dorothy Finwall
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