At the Harvard commencement, a new graduate gave a remarkable speech about the importance of talking in a civil manner to those with whom you disagree.

Noah Eckstein began his speech to his fellow graduates and faculty with the familiar opening to a joke: “A Christian, a Muslim, and a Jew walk into a bar…”

Everyone waited for the story and the punchline, but it was not what they expected. Eckstein explained that one grandparent was Christian and the other was Muslim. They had a daughter who was raised as a Christian. She married a Jew. They had a child, and that is me, a proud Jew.

He described how his family disagrees without hatred, how they have taught him to respect that other people have other views.

One of his central messages: “Listen before you speak.”

This is a message for our times.