Donald Trump spoke today, presumably in response to massive demonstrations across the country against racism and police brutality. Someone decided this would be a good time to make a pitch for school choice. Robert Shepherd, author and editor, transcribed Trump’s remarks and added his own commentary.

Here, in his typical toddler English, our part-time president in the orange clown makeup, IQ45, struggles, today, to remember an Ed Deform slogan:

“We’re fighting for school choice, which is really the civil rights [long pause, weird face; he can’t recall the word and finally just leaves it out] of all time in this country. Frankly, school choice is the civil rights [pause; he still can’t find the word] statement [sic] of the year, [he realizes he made a ridiculous gaffe in saying that this was the most important issue of all time; there was, for example, the matter of slavery] of the decade, and probably beyond because all children have to have access to a quality education. A child’s ZIP code in America [as opposed to her ZIP Code in Sri Lanka?] should never determine their [sic] future, and that’s what was happening, so we’re very, very strong on school choice, and I hope everybody remembers that, and it’s happening. [What’s happening? Who kn​ows.] It’s already happening. We have tremendous opposition from people that [sic] know they shouldn’t be opposing it. [These people who oppose it are just perverse. LOL.] School. [pause] Choice. [He says it as though he’s just recently learned the term and expects that other people have never heard it before either. LOL.] All children deserve equal opportunity because we are all made equal by God. So true. [said as if a comment on something a speech he was advised to make, which it probably was.] A great jobs market and thriving economy is [sic] probably the best thing [sic] we can do to help the black, Hispanic, Asian communities.”