Who do you think should be required to teach? We are watching the entries in the teacher survivor contest, and here is another strong contender:
Im a fourth grade teacher in Texas.
My contestants would be George W. Bush, Rick Perry, my micro managing principal, Bill Gates, President Obama, M. Rhee, and Duncan. They would be assigned a fourth grade class in a so called low performing school. Living in the community on a teacher salary would be a must. Each contest would be responsable for getting their classroom ready and weekly lesson plans. Contestants would learn how they have narrowed the curriculum when 25 kids walk in that have no idea that Texas is our state not a country or how to write a complete sentence since their only focus in previous years has been reading and math, but they will take the Writing STAAR in March. Each contestant will have a variety of ELL, Sped, GT, RTI, and learning impaired students. Oh and dont forget students with behavioral and emotional issues. Contestants will have to differintiate their teaching for the above, on,and below level students. They must make note how they are doing this in their weekly lesson plans. After each benchmark the contestants with the lowest % of passing students will be placed in the middle of town to answer for their bad teaching and then fired. The contestants that make it past the first round will be required to tutor after school and on Saturdays for free. They will need to turn in lesson plans for this in addition to their weekly ones.
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My contestants (Michelle Rhee, Campbell Brown) will have to do the following:
Teach five different levels of Latin. Write 450 different lesson plans per year. Lesson Plans must show evidence of Tate strategies, Marzano, the Maginificent Seven, and differentiate. One year I didn’t get any textbooks for one level of my students till almost the beginning of the second semester, so I’d add that in. Thus, contestants would have to create all materials for half of a year. In some classes, there would be multiple levels in the same class (with different curricula and expectations). The teacher must not only differentiate for the students in the same level, but figure out how to teach two different classes at the same time. One also has to create a word wall for each level (and of course, vocabulary changes every week for every level). The teacher should also both get the students and oneself in combined level classes to sometimes work through lunch to get more instructional time in. One should also do tutoring at least one day a week after school. The candidate will also have to complete parent communication logs, tutoring logs, and other things. The candidate will also have a duty, such as guarding a bathroom at least every other day. The candidate will also be ultimately responsible for the work a student who is homebound or at alternative school should be doing and provide work to these other teachers as well as grade it. The candidate will also be able to complete technology uses for each level, so get ready for setting up five different levels of webquests, etc. The candidate will be required to do scripted “advisory” group lessons, despite needing time to teach Latin. The candidate will be required to help students make-up work missed due to being pulled out for extra tutoring in other tested subjects. The candidate will have to be on every test creation committee, as the sole teacher of the subject in the building.
George Bush and Rick Perry are not bright enough to teach. Bush admitted to being learning disabled when he said he memorized his school work. He wouldn’t be able to write his lesson plans. Perry, well, listen to his speeches. He is better suited to be a Baptist preacher. Those two would screw up the kids. Bill Gates is rumored to have Aspergers so he would have trouble relating to the students and probably sit in the corner and develop a new technology the school could not afford. Rhee would just talk her trash to Obama and Duncan, the only ones bright enough to comprehend what she was saying, but too uninformed to understand that it was bull—- take over the class, boss the kids around, put everybody in uniforms and fire Duncan and Obama and become Queen of the World.
And–she would tape their mouths shut (including her fellow contestants)!
Oh snap! twinkle1cat
ReTiredbutMisstheKids – You may want to keep Rhee and her new husband away from the kids. She denigrates her own kids, tapes and humiliates others, and Mayor Kevin well….he seems to have a weakness for 16 year- olds. What a repulsive couple. I still can’t figure out why they haven’t both been carted away. Perhaps soon, before they can inflict anymore harm or damage.
I’d toss Arne and Bill Gates in the mix. They can team teach. You may want to add the parent phone calls, check ins, PTA/PTO meetings and college recommendations. Also updates to the school or your website and online grades .For good measure that possible part-time job at anytime (after-school, weekends and holidays, and/or vacations) For the bonus round- subject them to Rhee’s IMPACT or some other arbitrary nonsensical 25 page/pound evaluation document. Do it for a 2-3 years. Then lets talk.
Great contest … excellent!
Oh … and don’t forget to pull these contestants out of their classroom, with little notice, for several long and unhelpful professional development sessions, thus negatively impacting any academic gains their students may have made – not to mention how much time these contestants will spend writing sub plans when they could be focused on instructing their students. What fun!
And … if they complain, penalize them for showing any emotion / passion and summarily label them as ineffective … unprofessional … uncooperative.. not a team player …
so yesterday … backward … trouble-maker … in need of counseling … etc.
Marginalizing their “normal” reactions is a must. If they turn to the teachers association/union for support, marginalize the this organization, as well, and up their penalty.
I definitely would tune-in to this Survivor program.
I think the contestant possibilities are endless.
How about some “experienced” teachers and David Coleman?
Thanks for sharing … your creativity “takes the edge off”.
These scenarios just get better and better.
And then the principal proposes a little sexual activity in order to assure a good evaluation, on a mat in his back office of course.
Lets not forget to pull out the learners that need ur support the most to do test prep because classroom lessons are not necessary for them. Then make sure you find time in the day to catch them up on the lesson they missed so you can get grades. Also, they will need to sit in on data meetings every week to poor over data from benchmarks until you are crossed eyed. Do this even though the data is meaningless since the kids are over tested and do not care any more. Then you have the kids with testing anxiety that our states have caused. Even though the teacher knows they are on level and very smart their nerves get the best of them and they fail over and over. Also, lets reward the kids that pass or show growth with a fun activity and punish the ones that do not with a “you must do better next time lecture”
I could go on and on…….
I wish someone would explain to me or research what we are doing to the kids that are developing anxiety due to testing at 9 and 10 years old. How this could possibly be healthy for our children?
I nominate the illustrious Mayor-for-Life Michael Bloomberg for “Survivor: Teacher Edition!” He will have to teach all of the students 4th Grade Teacher describes, with the caveat that the class size be 60. (He infamously has stated that a good teacher should be able to teach 60 students.) Have at it, Michael!
Excellent scenarios so far, but I can’t believe that no one has mentioned teaching the more rigorous Common Core State Standards that will prepare every child for college and/or career. Contestants must teach these standards, which they have in large part helped fund, with only materials that are aligned to the CCSS, are touted by publishers as “research-based”, and are mandated by the district. Contestants must also prove that they are effective teachers based on their students test scores AND that their students can out compete students at their grade level in every other country.
Ahhhhh. It’s great to know my reality is shared with so many others. Why are so many in the media unaware of our US educational reality? (rhetorical)
Interesting comment, Nancy. And, although you stated that your comment is rhetorical, here’s an interesting little story:
I had called a reporter in Chicago to thank her for a story she had written. Then, I suggested that she just might win a Pulitzer Prize if she wrote about certain other very serious infractions that were taking place around the state. She seemed very disinterested and sort of blew me off. The next article she wrote was a rather ridiculous piece on how, in certain suburban areas (more affluent, with parents who are more involved and demanding), children were receiving more accommodations for testing. Well, duh! These accommodations are there for special ed. students. Unfortunately, many districts DON’T follow the law in areas where parents are NOT as involved or are, for whatever reason, less knowledgeable. Then, it’s up to the teachers to inform the parents and, usually, up to the teachers (and THAT’s where the goodness of the unions come in–even though some administrators would rather the teachers DIDN’T keep parents informed, and want to write up/punish/threaten teachers for so doing–there’s the union to protect you, and all for doing the right thing by your students!) to make sure those accommodations are written into Individualized Educational Programs (I.E.P.s).
Anyway, this article resulted in criticism of the accommodations that WERE made for the areas aforementioned, creating a schism in the special ed. community (again, divide and conquer).
Sorry this is so long but, to be more to the point, numerous reporters do NOT understand the education beat. (Aside from the major reason for one-sided reportage: Big Business’ media monopoly.)
Fortunately, in the above example,another reporter for that paper has been covering ed. issues, and has been doing a wonderful job.
Bottom line? We need more Michael Winerips!
Amen! I’m a 4th grade teacher in Texas and I love your idea. It would be very entertaining to see governor good hair and that idiot Bush try to do our jobs!
No more hour or two hour lunches for these anointed ones. The kids get 30 minutes for lunch and that time includes going through the lunch line, paying for said lunch and then being seated. The teacher ends up with an actual eating time of about 15 to 20 minutes and make sure to hit the lavatory, too. Some schools, to save money, eliminate the school lunch cashier, and so the classroom teacher has to collect the lunch money first thing in the morning, even before the pledge, reconcile the lunch count for 30 kids and then have the money carried to the cafeteria. Not to mention phoning parents after the kids have gone home (or during their break or even during their lunch break), faculty meetings, changing the class bulletin boards on a monthly basis, parent teacher conferences, marking thousands of papers per month. A class of 30 fourth grade children can generate as much as 1500 papers a week. Taking a fourth grade class of 30 or more to the lavatory is an exercise in logistics, class control and lots of patience.
How about CT “Special Master” Steven Adamowski? He would make it easy on himself by abolishing F grades and attendance requirements as he apparently did in Hartford to improve graduation rates.
Pay particular attention to the comments by Hartford teachers:
http://jonathanpelto.com/2012/08/04/windham-and-new-london-beware-of-false-prophets/
I’d love to see Dr. Steve Perry and a Relay Grad School graduate. Live, in real time and unedited.
Has Rahm Emauel been casted on this show yet?
My comments are made concerning the message submitted by the fourth grade teacher from Texas. I am a high school graduate from Texas. I cannot agree with this teacher’s comments. Her short paragraph has so many grammatical, spelling, and punctuation mistakes that I find it difficult to believe that she has any pride in the profession she has chosen. I learned how to use a dictionary as soon as I learned to read; I learned about subject-verb and pronoun-antecedent agreement in the third grade in an elementary classroom in Texas filled with 35 children. Some of my classmates were learning impaired; most of us were from poverty level homes; all of us were there to learn. Has Texas narrowed its curriculum to the level that essentials of language progressive skills are no longer taught? I doubt it.
You doubt wrong – grammar has been eliminated – not on the test! I also think the writer of the post was using voice. Writing a comment on a blog is different than writing an educational paper.
Your doubts are wrong. Maybe it has been a while since you have been in a Texas classroom. Although some districts are standing strong and refusing to let their teachers teach to the test, many are faced with and feel that they have no other choice.
As far as my errors this is a blog and I typically respond to posts from different locations like my nook or phone (which can be tricky at times), so I’m sure I hit a wrong key or got to going fast or just didn’t notice. Sorry for not proof reading. If thats all you could think of to call me out on then I doubt your concerned about the real issue. Talk to me when you have been in the classroom.
I feel right at home here.
Thank you all (… except the”perfect”student . You missed, ” there are no perfect human beings” lesson, I guess.)
No one has mentioned this, so… I used to color the blocks in my schedule to signify the amount of time that my entire class was present in the room. To my chagrin, I had every child “present” only 14 hours of the 30 hour week. This in a 4th grade inner city school.
Besides the usual Art, P.E., Music, auditorium events,lice checks, and meetings that I had to attend, (grade level, Special Ed. Committee), the children were “out” for Resource Room, Remedial Reading, Remedial Math, Occupational Therapy, Physical Therapy, Speech Therapy, Hard of Hearing, Counselling, Mentoring program,Instrumental Music, Chorus, ESL class,or clinic appointments.
When we were all ” together”, we had to attempt to “catch up” in Science, Social Studies, and the lessons covered during the missed time. ( Tests cover the “regular” lessons, not remedial, “not on grade level”, classes. )
It used to be a lot more more fun 🙂