Peter Parnell and Justin Richardson, the authors of a popular—and frequently challenged—children’s book “And Tango Makes Three,” warn in this article that Florida’s “Don’t Say Gay” law threatens every book that deals with “gender identity.”
They wrote in The Washington Post:
Dear K-3 teachers of Florida,
Thank you for your kind messages! Please don’t feel bad. We totally understand why you have to stop reading our “gay penguins” book in school. You’re doing great and deeply important work at an extraordinarily difficult time to be a teacher. You shouldn’t have to worry about being slapped with a lawsuit for discussing homosexual seafowl.
We’ve been thinking this law leaves some pretty key terms undefined. Take “sexual orientation.” There are lots of them! Answering a question (“classroom instruction”) about any of them could land you in hot water. So just to be safe, you probably ought to pull more than our book from your curriculum. In case it’s helpful, here are a few we thought could run you into trouble.
• “The Story of Ferdinand” by Munro Leaf — for gender identity
We know, we love it too! But a bull that doesn’t roughhouse and prefers to sit in the shade and smell flowers? This is going to lead you right into some verboten gender-identity discussions. “Do some boys like flowers?” “Why don’t cows get invited to bullfights?” “Can ungulates be nonbinary?” You don’t want to go there.
• “Make Way for Ducklings” by Robert McCloskey — for sexual orientation
Such a gem, but sadly, there’s no way around the sexual orientation of this mallard couple. One is male; the other is female. They go island-hopping, hatch eight ducklings and look after their little ones together. Heterosexuality is a sexual orientation, people! Unless you want to be hit with newly illegal questions such as, “Are Mr. and Mrs. Mallard married?” or “Why would a girl duck want to marry a boy duck?” you should probably nix this one, too.
• “The Country Bunny and the Little Gold Shoes” by DuBose Heyward — for very sexual orientation
“The little girl Cottontail grew up to be a young lady Cottontail. And by and by she had a husband and then one day, much to her surprise there were twenty-one Cottontail babies to take care of.” Tempting at Easter time, but skip it.
• “Mike Mulligan and His Steam Shovel”by Virginia Lee Burton — for gender identity and sexual orientation
A hard-working backhoe named Mary Anne is bound to raise gender-identity questions. “How can you tell if an engine is a boy or a girl?” “Can boys be backhoes?” Steer clear. Ditto for the author’s books about a tractor (“Katy”) and cable car (“Maybelle”), as well as Watty Piper’s titular Little Engine That Could, who uses she/her pronouns. Meanwhile, all these machines appear resolutely single. Could they be asexual? Probably best to give a wide berth to all books featuring gendered heavy machinery, at least until we can figure out what’s what.
• “A Kiss for Little Bear” by Else Holmelund Minarik — for pansexuality
Grandmother wants to pass along a kiss to Little Bear, and so we watch a female bear kiss a female chicken, who kisses a male frog, who kisses a male cat, who kisses a male skunk, who gets into some serious necking with a female skunk (they marry) before giving the kiss back to the chicken, who kisses Little Bear. It’s like Berlin in the 1920s. Pass!
• “Good Night, Gorilla” by Peggy Rathmann — for that bedroom scene
A male zookeeper shares a bed with a woman who calls him “dear,” only to be joined by a mouse and an ape (who look as though they’ve been there before). You do not want to discuss “polyamory” with your principal.
• “The Very Hungry Caterpillar” by Eric Carle — for fabulousness
A ravenous, and possibly gender-fluid, male caterpillar mysteriously transforms into a “beautiful butterfly.” Trans parable? Don’t risk it.
Now that we think of it, eliminating all books with characters who have a gender identity or a sexual orientation doesn’t leave a lot. You’ll probably want to avoid all books that touch on love or relationships. Also, books with people or animals or things that are male or female or some other gender or non-gender.
Actually, it’s probably best to skip books altogether. Maybe stick with games.
Is duck, duck, goose okay?
Hang in there,
Peter and Justin
Even the prefixes “Mr. and Mrs.” denote gender orientation. Should we stop using them?
Of course, traditional views will not be verboten. Only ideas that can be used to split off a significant portion of the electorate by keeping them in a tizzy over the mole hill of social change lest they notice the mountain of corruption.
This satirical author apparently thinks logic is a part of these laws. What is they thinking?
Omigosh! but this brings up another, possible more dangerous situation. What about the K -3 teachers themselves? They might be male or female. They might have children. How to explain that? And they might even be gay, or non binary, or asexual. Wait- does that mean only robots should be teachers?
Students way up into high school are amazed when their teachers turn up in public places. Seeing Mrs D in Kroger blows them away. My brother, with whom I share many facial characteristics, is constantly being accosted i public retail places by my present and former students.
Recall that teachers during the Victorian Times (MY Grandmother was the first girl’s basketball coach in Wakelon, NC) had to resign when they married lest the children see them pregnant. Somehow we have worked through that one.
we can say this laughingly, “should only robots be teachers,” but we are certainly moving toward seeing more and more kids in front of computers in their classrooms
Not so fast with the “only robots should be teachers”. Teachers of what?
https://www.robotcompanion.ai/shop/ai-robots-full-figure/amber/
Only $3545
Although it would be a lot cheaper than a human teacher for a year.
Oh My My favorite books. Classics for their exquisite illustrations as well as the classic themes of kindness, beauty and love.
I posted this at OEN https://www.opednews.com/Quicklink/Beware-the-Gay-Penguins-T-in-General_News-Diane-Ravitch_Gender-Bias_Gender-Equality_Identity-220429-70.html
OMG I read “A Kiss for Little Bear” so many times to my kid. Pansexuality is perfect!
And of course Ferdinand refused to conform to gender identity. And Mary Anne and Mike’s special relationship?
But I am surprised they left out Frog and Toad, the absolutely delightful series by Arnold Lobel (who came out as gay) that was made into a musical with equally wonderful songs.
Frog and Toad! Bert and Ernie! Trump and Putin.
Love that!
Tru monad Putin would be in the horror section of this genre. But it might be interesting to see what some classic illustrators would do with these characters.
Hmmm. You are inspiring me, Marc!
I wonder if the DeSantis censorship list includes sexual predators like traffickers, rapists, sexual child abusers, et al.
Thinking ahead, IF DeSantis runs for president and wins, I predict many of us may be thinking that Traitor Donald Trump wasn’t that bad after all, just like some of us did about President Bush #2 after Trump was in the White House.
They are trying to make us habituated to tyranny.
So many things that terrify poor little tRumpublicans!
Correction: “Poor WIDDLE tRumpublican SNOWFLAKES.
I was trying not to frighten them any more than they already are.
But they are such manly men! Fortunately, we have Josh Hawley and Jordan Peterson and Tucker Carlson to mansplain to kids what being real manly men is all about! If only kids could all get instruction from them! Then, the entire next generation of young men could be just like Putin shirtless on horseback or me wrestling a Florida mosquito into submission!
Here, my tribute to Hawley, Peterson, and Carlson:
He’s the doughtiest, manliest man.
He drinks the Bud, then eats the can!
None can outdo him in kissing Trump’s can,
That derring-do, doughtiest, manliest man!
And Tango Makes Three is based on a true story. it’s a beautiful story and so appropriate for young children – who feel comforted hearing stories of loving, competent adults caring for babies and keeping them healthy and safe.